Day 15 was yesterday. As I said in my previous reports, the psychological side of the addiction is not to be minimized, but it can be overcome. As for myself, mornings seem to be one of my most vulnerable times of day. Yesterday morning, I had two smokes left in my last pack. I had fully intended to buy "just one more pack, just in case", later in the day. I had one an hour or so after rising, with my coffee; the enjoyment level was zero. A bit later, I had my shower and dressed as I had multiple errands to complete and, as I said, I had intended to pick up that "one more pack" (there's always that "just one more" isn't there?).
After dressing, I had the one smoke I had left; that was about 11:00 AM. Not only was it not particularly enjoyable, it was ever so mildly nauseating I then dawdled a bit, as I am wont to do at times, brushed my teeth, end ended up leaving at around 1:00 PM.
Upon completion of my rounds, I arrived home at around 4:00 PM. Arriving home after completion of errands is one of those "psychological triggers" that requires a smoke. The thing is that while making my rounds, I had completely forgotten to pick up a pack of smokes. I thought to myself that, after two weeks on the Chantix program, I had been reducing my smoking on a daily basis, and then finding that smoking just didn't make me feel better anymore - making a special run for smokes just wasn't going to happen. Oddly, I didn't choose my "quit day", it chose me.
That was 11:00 yesterday morning, nearly 24 hours ago. So what do I have to report? As far as "urges" for the rest of yesterday, yes, I had some, but they were easily sluffed off with a deep breath (I've heard that works, and it does). The urges are so minor that they're not really an issue. Last might I had a drink before dinner (yes, another "psychological trigger"), and I felt a slight urge, but nothing that I would even remotely call a "craving". After dinner, I must say that I don't even recall an urge, so if it occurred, it must have just been momentary. I retired at a reasonable hour, and slept well.
I awakened this morning a little after 7:00. My immediate thought was "uh oh, this is my weakest part of the day". Yes, while having coffee, I had an urge, but it was entirely manageable. I remembered that last smoke yesterday and how utterly unfulfilling it was. Besides I just remembered that I don't have any smokes anyway, and I'm nearing my first 24 hours of freedom. As I write this post, I must say that smoking is not on my agenda. I do know that it takes a long time to slay this dragon, but I'm in the fight for the duration.
I will write again tomorrow about my quest. If you are following this, I hope it gives you some kind of hope that there is hope in kicking this addiction, and never forget it's an addiction, not just a "habit". At this point, Chantix is working for me, and, if you have the desire to quit, it's an option that you might consider.